the things we do for love
by TamaraJagellovsk
Summary: Jack goes on a solo mission. Bad idea. John saves the day. Or not.


**To celebrate the fact that I've survived another cycle of my home planet around its central star plus the fact that this is my 50th published story I'm giving myself a little John, and he doesn't even have to jump out of a cake.**

~o0o~

Everything about that mission had gone wrong. Jack's pre mission intel didn't match the situation at all, and he'd found his contact with his throat slit. He should have backed out of it immediately. When they got him he cursed his own cocky assessment. No. He was so not able to handle this without John.

It turned out it was personal. The terrorist group in possession of the weapon that could destroy the planet wanted _him_. Jack Harkness. He tried to fight, talk and threaten his way out of it, but in the end it came down to him sacrificing himself - or see a planet extinguished. And yes, they knew about his little trick, so they'd make sure his death was permanent.

When John stormed the scene guns blazing Jack was relieved – and terrified. He knew what his partner was capable of – and willing to – do. He'd burn that planet to ashes if it saved Jack. And he did.

~o0o~

Jack lashed out, a brutal back handed blow to his partner's spectacular cheekbone that would leave a bad bruise. And John hit back the moment he found his feet. He was furious, and he was confused.

"I fucking saved your worthless life, Harkness!"

"By destroying a _planet_!"

"Yeah, so what? Didn't know anyone there."

Jack hit him again out of pure frustration. John was a killer, he'd never get it.

"What's your deal?", John snarled as he wiped the blood from his face. "Should've let them execute you?"

"Yes! For fuck's sake! For once do the right thing!"

John just looked at him. A small smile spread on his face as he cocked his head and closed the distance, fearless and vulnerable at the same time.

"I did", he breathed as he leaned in. "Easy choice."

Jack couldn't _not_ kiss him. No matter how mad he was, no matter how much he hated John for burdening him with the death of millions, the way his partner melted against him, relieved beyond words not to have lost him - he didn't have it in him to ignore that. John's kiss tasted like the blood they had shed and the tears John _wouldn't_ shed, and for a fraction of a second there was peace, and shelter, and safety among the chaos.

"I couldn't let them take you, Jack", John breathed. "I love you".

Jack pulled back, his annoyance spiking anew.

"That's not love. If you loved me you'd done as I asked."

"Stand back and let them kill you? As if _you_ would have done that."

Jack didn't say anything, he just held John's gaze, and when the penny dropped it was heart breaking. John swallowed and took a step back. Jack sighed.

"John..."

"Don't. I get it. You couldn't have shoved it in my face any more brutally."

~o0o~

When the Agency informed Jack the next day that they assigned him to a new partner he unsuccessfully tried to pull up John's coordinates . They simply didn't show up on his wrist strap. Space or time or both had swallowed him, and the Agency was unable or unwilling to help. Classic John, running off into the sun set without a trace and no chance to explain. He'd never been big on impulse control...and Jack did miss him.

~o0o~

Jack knew his partner – damn it, that 'ex' felt wrong – and he knew the places John liked. So it was only a matter of Time – really? – until they ran into each other again. A bar, of course. A little run down but kind of nice. A place they might have frequented together after a mission; or as part of a mission, actually. Recon. Meet a contact. Make a deal. Get drunk and make out on the dance floor. That kind of thing. Jack took a breath and sat down on the stool next to John.

"Are you done sulking?"

John didn't even look up from his glass.

"Fuck you, Harkness."

"You want me to make a pun?"

"Please refrain from it."

Jack turned to look at him. Damn but he was beautiful.

"John, look, I know you're hurt. You've always been terribly sensitive -"

That got his attention.

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"You took off at top speed because I don't love you as much as you love me, and I get that that's painful -"

John spit in his face. Now _that_ had been unexpected.

"You stupid, arrogant little piece of shit."

"Huh?"

"You think I left because I was _heartbroken_?"

"Well, yeah – am I wrong?"

"I _left_ because I don't _trust_ you, Harkness. I didn't even have to think about what to do on that last mission, because you were my partner. Do you remember what that means? _All_ the meanings of that word? What it _should_ mean? I did what I had to do, what I've always done, and I'd do it all over again, no matter what without even blinking if you still were my partner. And you made it very clear that you wouldn't. I can't trust you to have my back. I can't go on a mission with a guy I can't rely on. So if you'll excuse me, I have some serious drug abuse to do tonight, and then I'll be off. Mission call tonorrow."

He stood, took his glass and disappeared towards the back of the bar, no doubt off to find his new partner. Current partner, Jack reminded himself. And damn it did that feel wrong.


End file.
